Self-kindness. Self-compassion entails being warm and understanding
toward ourselves when we suffer, fail, or feel inadequate, rather than
ignoring our pain or flagellating ourselves with self-criticism. Self-
compassionate people recognize that being imperfect, failing, and
experiencing life difficulties is inevitable, so they tend to be
gentle with themselves when confronted with painful experiences rather
than getting angry when life falls short of set ideals. People cannot
always be or get exactly what they want. When this reality is denied
or fought against suffering increases in the form of stress,
frustration and self-criticism. When this reality is accepted with
sympathy and kindness, greater emotional equanimity is experienced.
by Dr. Kristin Neff
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