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March 15 Puns
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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:22 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:20:33 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:20 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Aspiring: A circle of donkeys being disposed of by fire because of foot
in mouth disease.

Cantering: A Jewish liturgical choir standing in a circle.

Capturing: The headgear worn by the great codebreaking genius who
deciphered the Enigma codes at Bletchley Park ENGLAND and not America
using amongst others a machine captured by the BRITISH Royal Navy!!
(That daft film again!)

Cockering: Anal intercourse!  (^!^)

Collaring: Mark on the neck left by a heavily starched shirt.

Concurring: Against circles of dogs.

Conferring: Against circles of mink.

Cohering: Circular arrangement of several tubes containing carbon/metal
granules connected by via a tuned circuit to an aerial in a VERY ancient
radio receiver.

Deterring: A ring that discourages attack.

Littering: A ring that spews out trash.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:22 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:20:48 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:20 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Tahoe: Used to remove Ta weeds in a Ta garden.

Pollutant: A very dirty ant.

Emission: Electronic church.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:22 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:21:02 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:21 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Rambo: Decoration on a male sheep.

Bovine: Vine that grows cows.

Pigmy: I've been turned into a pig!

Rooster: Spinning kangaroo.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:22 pm
Newsgroups: alt.humor, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:21:20 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:21 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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MT: Tea that leaves you empty.

Obesity: Tea that makes you fat.

Obesity: A city of fat people.

County: Tea that does math.

Fascination: An interesting country.

Imagination: A country that just in the mind.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:23 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:21:57 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:21 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Cape Verde: A nation of green cloaks and tunics.

Belgium: A ringing jewel.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:27 pm
Newsgroups: alt.humor, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:25:29 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:25 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Denmark: A nation of cave paintings

Seychelles: Shells that talk.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:27 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:25:48 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:25 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Admit: Glove advertisment.

Emit: Computer glove.

Helmit: Satan's glove.

Remit: Put on your gloves again.

Submit: Neptune's glove.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:27 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
Followup-To: alt.support.autism
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:26:25 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:26 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Overload: The higher part of a mine.

Detail: The story.

Irrelevant: Having nothing to do with a pachyderm's auditory organs.

Impeccable: Resistant to birds' beaks.

Sincere: One who can discern misbehavior.

Your inability to speak isn't permanent; it's just aphasia go through.

Social we look for some more puns?


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:28 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:26:45 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:26 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Mitigate: External portal festooooned with gloves.

Imitation: Pointing out an Indian glove manufacturer.

Remit Again:  Sad WW2 Song by Vera Lynn.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:28 pm
Newsgroups: alt.humor.puns, bit.listserv.autism
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:27:14 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:27 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Levity: Tea that makes you laugh.

Realty: Tea drunk by real estate agents.

Rambo: Decoration for a male sheep.

Vomit: A regurgitating glove.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:29 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:27:40 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:27 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Leftovers: Opposite of Rightunders.

Porno: Opposite of Richyes.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:29 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:28:13 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:28 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Negate: A gate that makes things disappear.

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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:30 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:28:26 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:28 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Tim Bruening wrote:
> Leftovers: Opposite of Rightunders.

In between are Middlecenters.

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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:30 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:28:45 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:28 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Pollutant: A very dirty ant.

Emission: Electronic church.

Submission: Underwater church.


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:30 pm
Newsgroups: alt.humor, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:29:03 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:29 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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E-Quine: Electronic horse.

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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:31 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:29:48 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:29 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Commission and Emission: Electronic churchs.

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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:31 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:30:14 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:30 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Remission: To rebuild the church.

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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 15 2004, 7:32 pm
Newsgroups: bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 00:30:35 -0800
Local: Mon, Mar 15 2004 7:30 pm
Subject: March 15 Puns
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Lockerbie: A bee with the Key.

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entropy  
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 More options Mar 16 2004, 2:01 am
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
Followup-To: alt.support.autism
From: entr...@farviolet.com
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 09:01:43 -0600
Local: Tues, Mar 16 2004 2:01 am
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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["Followup-To:" header set to alt.support.autism.]
On 2004-03-15, Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote:

> Asperger: Ground donkey meat.

I would have said ground snake meat "asp-burger"

> Tactile: A floor with lots of sharp points.

It would certainly be tactile if you walk on it barefoot :)

---
 A new legal high: 1 tbsp of Dave's Insanity sauce, savor slowly without
 drinking water. As soon as the screaming, running around in agony, and
 thrashing about on the floor is over, you'll feel great, trust me... ]:)
  Be a counter terrorist perpetrate random senseless acts of kindness


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headdr  
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 More options Mar 16 2004, 10:17 am
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: "headdr" <tmach...@mindspring.com>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 23:17:01 GMT
Local: Tues, Mar 16 2004 10:17 am
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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"Tim Bruening" <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:405562E1.CEB3334B@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

> Bipolar: Farewell to the Arctic.

> D. Fine: A demon that issues parking tickets.

> NT: Favorite tea of neurotypicals.

Bipolar: A white bear with ambiguous sexual drives.

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headdr  
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 More options Mar 16 2004, 10:22 am
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: "headdr" <tmach...@mindspring.com>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 23:22:48 GMT
Local: Tues, Mar 16 2004 10:22 am
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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"Tim Bruening" <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message

news:405562F5.D03082B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

> ADD: A condition that compels you to do math.

ADDH: A condition that compels you to do math quickly.

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Robin May  
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 More options Mar 16 2004, 1:17 pm
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Robin May <northcircu...@btopenworld.com>
Date: 16 Mar 2004 02:17:33 GMT
Local: Tues, Mar 16 2004 1:17 pm
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote the following in:
news:405562F5.D03082B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us

> ADD: A condition that compels you to do math.

Tosser: A name given to those compelled to crosspost bad puns to autism
newsgroups.

--
message by Robin May, enforcer of sod's law.
Routemaster routes 6 and 98 are going. Last day 26th March. Ride them
while you can.

"You MUST NOT drive dangerously" - the Highway Code
There are 20,000,000 women wearing kinky boots.


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Sojourner  
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 More options Mar 16 2004, 3:10 pm
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Sojourner <CuzYerMammySai...@ThatsWhy.cox.net>
Date: Mon, 15 Mar 2004 22:14:52 +0100
Local: Tues, Mar 16 2004 8:14 am
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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headdr wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:405562F5.D03082B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

>>ADD: A condition that compels you to do math.

> ADDH: A condition that compels you to do math quickly.

SOjo+ADD: ADD-er who hates math.

Sojo


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Bubbleghost  
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 More options Mar 16 2004, 6:19 pm
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Bubbleghost <B...@mtdomain.demon.co.uk>
Date: Tue, 16 Mar 2004 07:12:34 +0000
Local: Tues, Mar 16 2004 6:12 pm
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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In article <Xns94AE17497A0D1NewhamCahncilare...@130.133.1.4>, Robin May
<northcircu...@btopenworld.com> writes
>Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote the following in:
>news:405562F5.D03082B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us

>> ADD: A condition that compels you to do math.

>Tosser: A name given to those compelled to crosspost bad puns to autism
>newsgroups.

The worse the pun, the better it is - if it makes you groan, then it's
worth the bandwidth.

--
Bubbleghost     http://www.mtdomain.demon.co.uk


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Tim Bruening  
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 More options Mar 17 2004, 12:46 pm
Newsgroups: alt.support.autism, bit.listserv.autism, alt.humor.puns
From: Tim Bruening <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us>
Date: Tue, 16 Mar 2004 17:45:00 -0800
Subject: Re: March 15 Puns
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Sojourner wrote:
> headdr wrote:
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbru...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:405562F5.D03082B2@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...

> >>ADD: A condition that compels you to do math.

> > ADDH: A condition that compels you to do math quickly.

> SOjo+ADD: ADD-er who hates math.

Why does SOjo+ADD hate math?

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